Monday, December 10, 2007
Long Day
I did however learn today that I have amazing friends. People came out of the woodwork to wish me well, and try to bring a smile to my tired and stressed out face. Basically I am feeling very loved. I also sold my housing contract, and so I am now looking for a place to move into. Oh man I have to decide this right away.
Sunday, December 9, 2007
1 am musings
Everyday the world is hurried and filled with stress, worry, and just lots of noise. But not today. Today I just enjoyed the snow, learning and wonderful company.
I also enjoyed a bit of theatre. I was fortunate enough to get to see BYU perform Little Women the musical. Its cheesiness sometimes created a bit of uneasiness, but as a whole I adored the performance.
I realize that I probably should retire to bed so that I may rise again to enjoy this beautiful day.
Friday, December 7, 2007
Rantings
I need to write to clear my head
I need to write to get my thoughts in order
I need to write before I burst into tears
My fingers yearn to type out the words of my full and frustrated heart
There are other things I need to do to occupy these precious moments
Responsibilities sit beside me in piles up to my ears
But still I need to write
I need to write
I need to write to keep from crying
I need to write so that I can move on
Perhaps I think that in writing I will be able to decide what it is that I am thinking
Perhaps I just want to write because I do not have someone to listen
Perhaps it is just too hard for me too tell someone how I feel
Perhaps I fear their judgment
Yet I need to write my story
I need to write about my week of smiles, my week of tears, my week of trials
I need to tell someone the thoughts which my spoken words cannot express
I need to write until I can say what I actually need to say
It is odd how I feel better
It is odd because there is not really anything that I have actually said
It is odd because I am not a writer
I rarely feel the need to vent the feelings of my heart and mind on a computer screen
I rarely feel like writing because I worry that it will sound mundane
And still I write
I write
I write
I write
Still not saying anything at all